Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Summer of Yes

Last month I read a book, Girls in White Dresses[1], in which the characters discussed having a Summer of Yes.  The rules were they had to say ‘yes’ to everything [within reason] in order to gain some new experiences and give people they normally would not give a shot.  As I am always up for trying new things, I figured I would adopt this theory into my own life.

Luckily for me, I haven’t been asked on any horrific dates like depicted in the book (although that’s my normal life) but I have participated in some pretty cool new activities.  I went to a dueling piano bar[2] a few weeks ago, soberly, and it was still a lot of fun.  I am signed up for the Color Run[3] coming up on Saturday, I also signed up for a cupcake tour (I am a fat kid at heart), a graffiti tour, and I have plans to go to an ‘ice bar’ all on the docket.   Last weekend I even took a spontaneous trip out to Coney Island, which isn’t too crazy of a plan, but it was impulsive.   The Summer of Yes actually kicked off with an NYPD BBQ at the Boat Basin in the city, followed by a bar party in my neighborhood; and as if that was not an eventful Friday enough, the weekend continued with another eventful BBQ  that was more like a reunion party.  I also went to a pinot and painting class where I made a pretty interesting painting, and some impromptu happy hours.  So far this Summer of Yes is going pretty well for me . . . probably because it just involves me going to new events with my friends, but I’ll take it!  At least it puts me into new environments where I have the potential to meet more people.  Not every blog/project in my life has to be about dating . . . although that certainly keeps things entertaining.

What really prompted me to write this blog, though, is an interesting email I received yesterday.  My cousin sent me an email linking me to another girl’s blog[4] who is giving herself a personal challenge, to go on 100 dates by the end of the summer.  Now, my cousin who sent me the link took the argument that I should try the same thing.  However, the thought was that I don’t go on enough dates and maybe I would be more lighthearted about them and as a side effect, I would have more material.

My problem with this is that I am pretty lighthearted when it comes to dates.  That could be for several different reasons, but for the most part I don’t get ‘crying in fetal position in the corner’ nervous about them.  Yet I think if I went on more dates, I would be completely turned off by the idea of dating.  I am under the impression that you should be selective with dating because if you are not, you will get burned out and not want to go on any.  Last year I went on a whole bunch of dates, and in no time at all I was irritated by the whole idea of dating.  This year, while I try to be more selective, I still go on my fair share of ‘why not’ dates, but I cut that number down by a lot.  You shouldn’t have to force these things.  If you’re not feeling the person, the idea of the date does not excite you, or really, you have no feelings on the matter whatsoever, then these are all reasons not to go.  I don’t force myself to go out because I know if I’m not going in a positive mindset, that isn’t doing me or the other person any favors.  Furthermore, if I’m not excited to go out or see the other person, then they probably aren’t right for me anyway.

So while I wait for someone interesting to come along, I will keep up with the Summer of Yes and see what other kind of trouble I can get into.  Sure, dueling pianos might seem like your idea of a placid night, but considering the musicians kept calling us the ‘heavy metal table,’ interacting with us and rocking our interesting song requests, it was anything but serene.  These are the best years of my life, where I am completely unattached and can do anything I want on a whim, I am absolutely going to take full advantage of it.  What better way to do that than to spend time with the amazing people I already have in my life, trying new things, and meeting some potential new friends along the way? I am always reminding myself to love where I’m at in life, not just worrying about the future or glamorizing the past.  With all these new and interesting escapades I am going on, and just where my life has taken me so far, I am pretty sure no one loves their life as much as I do.  Bring it on, Summer of Yes, I am ready and able for all adventures coming my way.

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