Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Fairytales are made for storybooks- Confessions of a 21st Century Cynic


Have you ever seen the show Once Upon a Time?  The premise of the show is that our favorite fairytale characters are thrown into a world where they get no happy endings; our world.  They are forced to live out their lives around their princesses and princes yet never know their fairy book romance or get the happy end to their underdog story.

This got me thinking, that theory is a lot what people who believe in ‘true love’ follow.  I mean, I have a snarky cynic shell, but my jury is still out on the idea of soul mates, true love, and having one person be everything…forever.  That thought really brings around more questions and angst than it does a comforting notion that I will have a lifelong love.  For instance, what if you do not find your ‘one person’? What if you find them and then something happens and they die or leave your life, or what if they don’t want you? What if you guys grow a part and in different directions as you get older? Does that mean that they weren’t the right one for you? Also, does ‘the one’ mean that they are the ONLY person for you at any particular moment, or that there is only one person in the whole wide world for you; and if you don’t find them, well then tough noogies buy yourself a bakers dozen of cats and call your lovelife quits.

What about all those people that meet their spouse in High School (yeah, Corey and Topanga[1] I am talking to you!)  Those kinds of people absolutely astonish and amaze me, I feel like they deserve a metal.  How can two people be together for so long and not 1) grow tired of each other or 2) grow apart as they get older.  It seems one in a million chance to have two people that are not related and did not have the same upbringing to grow in the exact same direction for their whole lives. 

Now don’t get me wrong, I would love to have a love like that.  I want to have a once in a life time, fairytale romance; have someone fawn after me and look at me like the first time every day.  I just don’t know how long that novelty lasts; because, in my cynic heart of hearts, it has to be a novelty.  I wish it wasn’t, I wish I could see that kind of love up close, but I never have.  And it leads me to believe that it cannot exist in this kind of day and age where people do not get married until they are well into their 30s and often choose their careers over everything else.  I’ll be the first to admit it, my ‘free time’ consists of my 2 hour daily commute or my weekends when I try to cram 5 days of chores and family obligations into 2.  For the busy bee such as myself, where will you find ‘true love’? No, you do not find true love, you find love based on convenience and whoever will put up with your workaholic tendencies and stress related chronic crankiness.  So does this mean anyone who has the audacity to be career oriented does not deserve a fairy tale romance? Why are all these princesses just hanging around their house until their Prince finds them? I don’t do house chores, don’t need saving, and do NOT have woodland animals creepishly infesting my house.  So does that mean I do not meet the criteria and thus have no hope in finding a once in a life time love?

For that reason I tend to dislike the standard fairy tales.  I like the Brothers Grimm versions of ‘Scary Tales’ but that is neither here nor there on this particular topic.  As far as love stories are concerned, I like to idolize things like The Notebook because it shows the dysfunctional side of true romance.  That’s what I feel like is the modern day capability of love; people fighting, arguing, and wanting to kill each other 90% of the time but that just shows their passionate side for each other.  I like the idea of being so invested and in love with someone that you rather fight with them than be happy with anyone else.  While that may in fact make me a masochist, I think it is a sweet idea.  I would like to find that idea of love.  But again it leaves me at the same point, where do you find these people?  I do not believe in serendipity because I feel way too many people (myself included) spend more time questioning life rather than living it. With that in mind, would anyone recognize and act on a serendipitous moment if it does indeed present itself? The answer is no, probably not.  And you know the chances of a quality love story starting with ‘Tequila Tuesday’ at your local watering hole is not happening.  The next viable option is the internet, but I feel like the thought of internet dating reminds me of two extremes, creepy stalkers, or people too afraid to make a move in real life so they take their endeavors to the virtual world.  Both scenarios do not scream ‘passionate soul mate’ connections.

I wish I could end this blog with a profound line or an epiphany, but this is more just talking aloud wondering if anyone can shine any light on this scenario.  So if anyone knows where True Love is hiding, or possibly has a flashlight for the mystical fog that is my perception of the crock of doody of love, it would all be greatly appreciated.


[1] Boy Meets World reference, circa the 90s

2 comments:

  1. The joy of fairy tales is they come from an oral tradition. Which means that each person that told those stories changed it just a little bit to suit themselves. So, "fairy tale love" exists...you just need to figure out what that term means in your fairy tale.

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  2. I really like that response. Definitely helps shine a light on the dismal view that I have....I know I know, cynical and jaded isn't an attractive look.

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